Surf's Rude Blogger Up

Somebody's lying. Kyle Sampson basically stuck a knife in Alberto Gonzales' back rather than fall on his own sword. And then there's those pesky e-mails.

Senator shrimplate questioning Sampson, taken from the C-SPAN transcripts:

"Dude, you are like, so totally bent, man. What were you thinking? Yeah, I know, we're just a bunch of stupid Senators here but we're not all dumbfucks like that dickweed Cornyn over there. Like really."

Sampson: "Wha'?"

Senator shrimplate: "Makes as much sense as anything else you've said today. You're kind of a, like, what? A dumbass, eh? Like nobody'd notice a few fired lawyers. Get real, dude."

Sampson: "Huh?"

Senator shrimplate: "Stay out of small planes, dude."

Sampson: "Not that I recall."

Senator shrimplate: "Uh, did I ask a question, Kyle? May I call you Kyle?"

Sampson: "Er, no. And Yes. Definitely yes. Kyle is cool."

Senator shrimplate: "Hehehe. Cool Kyle. Chuckles for you, dude."

Senator Cornyn interrupted to protest this as an unseemly waste of time and added that he didn't see the point of this line of questioning. All huffy and righteous-like. Face puffy and red.

Senator shrimplate shoots a glance at Senator Leahy and then says to Cornyn: "Shut the fuck up, dick-face. It's not your turn," and looks again at Sampson.

Senator shrimplate: "So what you're saying is that Abu Gonzo's your basic lyin'-ass bitch. You like working for people like that? It was like, what, fun?"

Sampson: "Ahh, no. Not that I can recall."

Senator shrimplate: "Like, well duh, dude."

Postscript,

Over at Eschaton it was "Talk Like Pulp Fiction Night" but I was in more of a Circle Jerks kind of mood.